Friday, 13 September 2013

Resurrection ...

In my element: on my travels with time to write and sketch
I last posted on this, the most personal of my blogs, seven months ago - on 14th February. Since then, a whole Spring and Summer have somehow passed me by. It has been a fraught time, a life I have not felt able to share though alluded to occasionally elsewhere. Where did the wild child go? 

Dancing in  my mind ...
She struggled; events became overwhelming, tumbling one over another in a frightening whirlwind. Even breathing seemed impossible. Well, hopefully she now has  it cracked. I am not ashamed to outline the solution. For 'WSC' is of course ME., and always has been.

Feeling spiky !

The cause of my inability to function: three years of RQ's health problems led to those of my own and a summer when I became increasingly unwell. Nothing physical it transpired after tests and repeated visits to our excellent doctor. In the end, she referred me to a consultant to sort my mental state. There, I've said it. Mental. Had it affected my professional commissions I would have been hesitant to comment; it didn't - everything just took me longer, and with a heavy heart.

Sitting on my consultant's table was a perfect starry allium seed head,
just like this which I grew in my potager.
The consultant was brilliant and set me on a road to recovery in just six weeks. I will never forget the sessions sitting in her beautiful consulting room, talking, as she gently released me from my fears and worries. There have been setbacks, as long ago as last week in Brittany; but at least I now know how to cope. And how to pace myself. The consultant's aim was to make herself redundant, allowing me to sort the problem in my own mind. A mind which is functioning clearly again.

Eight months on and the kitchen is gradually returning to normal
(and the painting was gifted to us by the artist, a fellow aviator at
Blackbushe where RQ and I learned to fly in the mid-'70s on this aircraft)
Strangely, the creative muse never left me which was such a relief, though everything else has suffered. But today I began the reclamation of the kitchen. RQ still on his knees polishing the floor, whilst I washed glass and crockery and started to put the larder back together. The forgotten garden is another matter; brambles have rampaged through all my overgrown beds, and vegetables sown in March have gone the way of all neglected produce.

One of the slides I have prepared for my forthcoming presentation
I have new goals, and further directions to explore. Not all will be achieved and plans will surely change. But I truly hope that others who may feel they have somehow reached the end of the road and strangulation point can take heart from my experience, and the good fortune to encounter a consultant as helpful as I had. Updates on my activities will appear on my various blogs, according to the topic. Right now, I have a month to prepare a public slide presentation on 'My Stitching Story' - a new challenge; I have never done this before and haven't even yet switched on my new projector !!

In the garden today:
a rain-drop bejewelled spider's web
See you next time - here, or on one of my other Blogs. (And it's Friday 13th ... I don't think I am superstitious, but am now not sure whether I should be posting this 'confession'.)