Thursday, 9 April 2009

All's well with the world (for me, anyway).....


April in middle England

A hawk hovers
     by the roadside verge –
Kestrel, sharp of beak and eye,
     rising to the wind, 
     and away.
Sunshine again, after a day of rain,
     under grey clouds
          now lifting;
A streak of light revealing
     a landscape fresh
          and rain-washed.
From this high hill, you can
     see for miles and miles,
     into the far distance;
As ever, so beguiling.

Back home, a low rainbow
     to the northeast;
More grey rain-clouds threaten
     showers
     – a proper English April –
     (another shower, another rainbow).
The driveway wallflowers shift
    and shimmer in the cool afternoon
          – my blood-red beauties –
Catch their silky fragrance;
     and remember Spring.

asm 9th April, 2009

My check-up with the doctor today revealed nothing physical, more a sort of longing for time to be myself, and a dichotomy between my whirligig creative present and a continual churning of ideas. Such a maelstrom of possibilities; I have to do some strict talking to myself about what is important and what is not. There is never enough time, and I have obligations. A beloved husband, and our house and garden, and all my writing. This much I know. Of course I do, and always have, but knowing does not relieve the ache in my heart. (So ..... when I should have been baking for tomorrow's lovely family gathering, what do I do but sit down and plan a new fabric book? !!!) 

But I will be all the fresher in the morning, knowing my thoughts are now on the page; and after an early start, gingerbread and flapjacks, vegetables and roast lamb, steamed sponge and fresh fruit, and evening salads, home-made pizza and jam tartlets will grace our family table. Six lively grandchildren - the boys will play football, in the rain; the girls and I will make tag-book journals; the parents (our children and their respective partners) will chat and drink wine, and Grandpa (Raymond) will snooze by the fire. It's such a shame that our elder son and his family cannot be with us (he is working over Easter, and we will all miss him).



Meanwhile, dear R. has transformed our yard (the pic only shows a small part of it); my greenhouse is full of  seedlings awaiting their life in the vegetable garden and my many 'square-foot' raised mini-plots. Before I go to bed, I will take the doctor's advice and 'do something for me' (selfish??) - I will transform some curtain interlining into what I term 'faux-suede' - the basis of my fabric book pages. Not my recipe (a kind of pva glue soup) but that of Angie Hughes, to whom I am indebted for the technique.

8 comments:

  1. I am reminded of Gooch, was it, in Aunty Mame....."I lived" boy are you "living"! It all sounds so wonderful and full...and I suspect that all the cooking is "for you" also and if not...tell them all to "bring a plate"

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  2. I'm glad you're okay.. I do understand the feeling of running in all directions and its so hard to slow down but sometimes we just have no choice if we wish to keep our sanity.
    Take care and enjoy your day with family.

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  3. have a wonderful easter, as it sounds like you will and yes, always remember to do something special for yourself. lovely flower

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  4. So glad you got the all clear.well, at least it puts your mind at rest and enjoy that wonderful celebration you are preparing. Sounds wonderful!
    I'll be thinking of you and your family.

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  5. I think it might be a good idea to share the chores..or are you a control freak like me? Need to do everything yourself becasue you do the best job?Anyway have a bit of'you' time.

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  6. Have a lovely weekend Ann. I so know the feeling of being desperate to do everything that is tangled up in my head - have it right now actually, so I am off to wash my hair :) Glad you are feeling better. xx

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  7. Have a rest at Easter if you can and spoil yourself. (I know just how you feel)

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  8. Glad you are feeling better Anne. One of the things I am learning is that we feel compelled to "do." It is how we are brought up, it is part of our society. What we also need, though, is to "be." It's hard because we feel we aren't being productive which is sinful, of course! But, I know we all need time just to be. If only we can find ways to allow ourselves this "indulgence."

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